Monday, February 25, 2008

Men's definitions

So a few readings ago (it was the Marking the Difference reading, by Hatty, if you're curious) I was really intrigued by the apparent differences in men's perceptions and my own (I'll probably just call it a woman's perspective). Things like the what is a man or a woman, how do you know someone is a man or woman; what is masculinity and femininity; are masculine and feminine behaviors learned or innate; and what is the ideal body for a man and a woman; as well as opinions on the body as a weapon, and women in the military. I found the reading to be so very different from what I believe that I decided to ask some male friends (who shall remain anonymous) what they believed. I think they all answered pretty honestly, but you can never be sure I guess. So anyways, here are the questions, and their responses (not word for word, because I'm a little lazy). Read and enjoy.

What is a man? How do you know if someone is a man?
A- By the hair, shoulders/build
B- Someone who's masculine [when asked what that was, he said it was being a man] and by the build of the person
C- Appearance, based on clothing primarily- jeans, hoodie, polo

What is a woman? How do you know if someone is a woman?
A- Anatomy, specifically having a vagina
B- Someone who's feminine [again, no definition beyond being a woman] and by hair as well as build (should be curvy)
C- Appearance based on jewelry, makeup, accessories, shoes, and longer hair usually done up, the build of the person as well as the manner of walking

What is masculinity?
A- little to no emotion shown- stoic; physical strength
B- Physical build
C- Being a man/guy [when asked, said it's based on a range of factors including activities, candor, expression, social abilities]

What is femininity?
A- Exact opposite of masculinity [when asked to elaborate, no further definition]
B- Based on physical build and personality
C- Being a woman [when asked again for more, same response as to previous question, said there is no difference between gender and sex]

Is this a learned behavior, and if so, where is it learned?
A- Learned from society, identified movies/media as a primary source
B- Learned from parents, specifically the father figure
C- No answer [when asked again, responded that he just believes these things, but doesn't know where he got the ideas- doesn't know if it's a social construct or natural]

What is the ideal female and male body?
A- no answers [when asked if he just didn't want to tell me, he said no, he just didn't have an answer]
B- Female body should be curvy; male body should be muscular
C- Very detailed answer- female body should be well toned overall with specific mention of legs, stomach and butt; symmetrical and proportionate in regards to face and breasts. Male body should be very fit, with specific mention to % body fat, abs, legs and arms, should not look like one is trying to be "manly"

Is the body a weapon?
A- possibly- as a sexual tool, or a physical fighting tool
B- can be if it is taught to be
C- not every day, but it can be- based on words, expressions and actions

How do you feel about women in the military?
A- "Nothing against it"; feels there is little difference between a man and a woman; should be based on ability to complete tasks, not sex/gender
B- "It shouldn't be any different than men"
C- "Go for it"; denied any reservations


There you have it- male perspectives on a small variety of issues. I found it interesting.

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